Diary of a Werewolf
I never liked my birthday, besides depressing trauma, December birthdays are hard. It’s too close to Christmas so if anyone does remember your birthday it is more than likely to be Christmas themed. It is not only cold, so enjoying the outdoors is not possible, but it has possibilities for snow which means if you host any event or even just want to go out to get cake, it makes roads dangerous and people cant show and you cant leave. Which really only leaves two options: Go somewhere there isn't snow, or celebrate your birthday on a different date, and I would rather die than travel out of the east coast of the united states. Unless it’s Alaska. I always wanted to go to Alaska.
It took me a few years to just be okay with my birthday. I no longer flew into fits of violent rage, but more so just dissociated out of boredom due to lack of options. So last year my partner asked what we can do to make me enjoy my birthday. I jokingly told them ‘If we celebrated it on a different date.’ when it then simultaneously hit us that...yes, that's actually a good idea.
Who is to say we need to subscribe to the exact date? If I want to have a different birthday, then I will. Yes, I won’t change my age, but it is still the event that truly matters. If something brings you discomfort, you need to acknowledge why. I did. You must then accept it and move on from it. I did. Then you can do things to change it if you want. Which, this past June 25th 2026, I did. The date has no meaning to me, it was just the first date that jumped into my mind when asked what date I would like to celebrate. Subconsciously I am sure I picked it because while living in Maine, I have come to the realization that things are really only open in the summer, if I wanted to go somewhere to do something. I’m sure there are other subconscious reasons, but the date is simply made up. If I wanted a special birthday I would have made the date the age I would be turning, or do some numerology, or have a leap year birthday.
When then prompted as to what I would want to do, months later when the date was closer, I said I wanted a summer camp themed birthday. I want to spend all my time outside as I never got to on my birthdays in the past due to weather. That I want to make things, I want to earn badges and learn new skills. I want to have a stress free day where there are choices I can make but they are on a list. Then comes the 25th and my loving partner gives me exactly that and more. They had made a whole list of options of things to do along with meal plans.
That day I learned how to finally properly use a drill and square and made a bird house, learned out to properly aim with a shooting contest, made a working mini tin radio, and even did more relax things like make large bubbles, and camp in the car in the woods. To make things better, the next day I got to sit and watch my partner play the newest chapter in deltarune, and while I couldn’t give two shits about the game, it was just a very nice equal balance of activity and focus on me and my joy, then relaxation and focus on them and their joy
.It also wasn’t only my partner who helped me celebrate, it was their parents who also loved the idea of me doing so and even gifted me flowers wishing me a happy birthday. Was this blog only to brag about how much fun I had? Partly. But It was also to mention how embarrassingly long it took for me to realize that not only do I not have to conform to gender and sex, I don’t have to conform to celebrating my birthday on the day or only a week early or late. I think more people should do this as I know a lot of people who also struggle with having birthdays on holidays, national tragedies, or just fucking hate their birthday. It is such a simple solution and I beg of you to explore that if you are like me as if I had done so sooner I would have been more healed mentally sooner.
Being a lesbian is so much more than a sexuality for me, it is a gender for not just myself but for my Owner as well. Lesbians come in many shapes, sizes, and identities. I just want to make my stance very clear that I am for all kinds of lesbians. I love Male lesbians, I love he/him lesbians. I love masc, butch, and stud lesbians. I love Bi lesbians. I love lesbians that have sex with men. I love lesbians who date men. I love fat lesbians. I love hairy lesbians. I love kinky lesbians. I love trans lesbians.
I love lesbians who are lesbians.
Lesbians are the smallest part of the LGBT community, so I am thankful every time I see a lesbian, that they are one. I do not care as to why they identify as a lesbian, but I would love to hear it. Everyone who is a lesbian has their own unique connection to lesbianism, so why not accept those who I might not completely understand. What is so hard to even understand though? Someone says they identify as a label, so what? That is all there is to it. The label is for them. Its only for you if you personally need it, and sometimes that happens. I personally only date other lesbians for that reason. I love dykes more than anything in the world. I would still say some bisexuals could be dykes, but I do love a lesbian dyke. I love my dyke.
Coming to terms with lesbianism was very quick and simple. I found out when I was very young, I still dated men just because I was bored and new it wouldn't ever go anywhere. I enjoy pretending to be human, playing along. Forming relationships and then dumping them, forming new ones, moving on. That pattern broke four years ago when I met my Butch(er). I didn't think it was possible for me to have empathy or care for a human being before, and yet suddenly I did. Learning that this is a natural emotion that most people are born having and have experienced most of their life with, I find it strange so many then scream and cry, putting negative energy into things that truly do not matter. A word.
The word holds meaning yes, but have you considered that word means something to that person as well? Lesbians come in many forms.We are far too few to attack others. Appreciate the ones still living first before you socially assassinate yourself due to your own personal highly specific morality. We are far too few to attack others.